Infinite Santa 8000 – Jultomten och cyborgslaktarna

Alright, so, Infinite Santa 8000… That title, eh? First time I heard it I seriously thought it was a cheap VHS I’d find at Hemmakväll on a rainy Thursday, behind some old Dolph Lundgren flicks from the 90s. But here we are in 2024 and this bonkers little film, directed by Michael Neel (not exactly Bergman), got me glued to my old sunkissed sofa with a mug of Gevalia and pepparkakor — and also a few existential questions.

So, the main “star” – if you can call him that – is this animated, gruff, gun-toting robot Santa (voiced by Duane Bruce, yeah I know, not someone you’ll see at Guldbaggegalan). The big “names” are more cult than classic. Director Neel and co-producer Greg Ansin have this punk horror past. You can totally sense their schlocky midnight-movie love – every frame kinda smells of people who grew up with trashy sci-fi and probably way too many cheap kebabs.

It’s bloody, loud, absurd, and sometimes you wonder if the whole thing’s a fever dream or if you just ate too much långfil at breakfast. Violence is cartoonish – reminds me weirdly of those old Swedish cartoons we used to swap on VHS during gymnasiet, except, you know, Santa’s blowing mutants to bits.

I’ll admit: sometimes I stopped the film to check the clock. Is it maybe 20 minutes too long? Sure. But I appreciate the commitment! Infinite Santa 8000 is like someone spiked your julmust and put on Mad Max at double speed.

Oddly, it did make me nostalgic for those childhood Christmas Eves in Skellefteå, journeying through snow to watch Röd tomte at midnight— except here, Santa’s got a shotgun and isn’t bringing julklappar, he’s bringing… carnage? Might not win any prizes for deep themes but heck, it’s a unique ride. So maybe watch with your weirdest cousin, some lussebullar, and just vibe with it.

watch the full movie on CinemaOneMovies on YouTube

please note that there may be geographical blocking implemented.